Name: Alexander KernKnown Aliases: Zander, Naitsabes Duxberry, Rednaxela, Monkey, Stinkin Mawnkey
Wanted For: 184 counts of disturbing the peace, thousands of counts of copyright infringement on the Cottoneyed Joe Splash Mix, 241 counts of asking questions he already knows the answer to
Name: Aidan "AJ" MullinsKnown Aliases: Aidan Pants, Champ, Peanut, Peanut Butter, Peanut Sauce, Nugget, Pumpkin, Knucklehead, Knuckles
Wanted For: 67 counts petty theft for stealing hearts of women in grocery stores, 17 counts indecent exposure for taking his diaper off, 1173 counts of crawling directly towards the one thing in the room he's not supposed to have
Name: Phil Kern
Known Aliases: mdrockstar79
Wanted For: aiding and abetting the dangerous criminals above
If you have any information that may lead the the capture of these individuals, please leave a comment below. Do not try to apprehend them on your own, they are known to be dangerously cute.
4 comments:
I am very concerned that boys with that sort of record are on the loose. I think its time to send out the bounty hunters.
oh my gosh . . . I live with two of them . . . I do believe I’ve been bamboozled
Yes, I will testify that they are all guilty of the alleged offenses....and that is why we love them!
Wait Wait -- we didn't raise our girls to associate with such beasts. What happened!???
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